Get to know me.

Q: What is unique about you?

A: * I’m a unique Asian woman. I stand 5’11” and am an ex-professional volleyball player with legs a mile long.

* I am very upfront and honest about myself. What you see is what you get.

* I bring up an Asian woman’s attitude about how a woman treats a man.

* I have magic fingers and strong hands for a wonderful body rub.

*I am well-traveled and cultured. I have been to 30 countries by myself, and I love international cuisine and exploring new cultures; I am a woman who is enthusiastic and curious about the world.

*  I have zero tolerance for crummy food and don't drink soda pop.

*  Last but not least, I think I am “whoresome”. I don’t promise anything, but I will always give my best effort. Sir, please hand over your wallet and get your head between my legs!

Q: How do I know that you are a legitimate provider? 

A: I have been verified by trustable websites such as P411, Trystlink, Slixa, Eros, etc.

I also have numerous reviews on Erotic Monkey, Private Delight, and Adultlook. Please check. 

Also, I am very active on social media with others on Twitter & Instagram.

Q: Can you describe yourself? 

A: Don't let my Chinglish become a barrier between us. I am a tall, strong-minded, delightful, oriental woman with a big heart.

I'm not the porn star/stripper/beauty queen type of woman. I am fantastic in my way.  I am the type who turns your head  in Trader Joe's and say to yourself, "Damn, she's an exotic Asian lady!" or "Her legs are killing it!" At the same time, I am saying to myself," I wish I could 'grab this man's butt 'accidentally.'

What unites two people? Food, travel, sex, and eroticism. I check them all!

I am a powerful woman with many naughty thoughts that I want to share with you; I am a very tactile woman who wants to put her hands all over you; I am a strong woman with a soft heart. Also discreet and genuine, I am not shy about what I want and how I want it. If you want to be treated like a V.I.P. (Very Intriguing Pen!s), you will have to make me feel like a V.I.P. (Very Impressive Pus$y).

Q: I want to see a picture of your face before I decide, may I?

A: And I want a billionaire boyfriend who takes me to the Maldives every winter, flying on Qatar Airways Business class. My face is reserved for paying customers only.

Q: What kind of man do you like? 

A: I like the type of man who gives me money, pays my rent, and makes me orgasm in the bedroom.

Q: What turns you on? 

A: I enjoy food, fruits (yes, that’s right, fruits!), discovering new countries, flying in business class, sparkling wine, romance, feeling nourished, feeling protected, affection, kindness, gentleness, strength, and of course, seeing you hand me the money. 😃

More than anything, a generous, respectful man enjoys kissing as much as me and does not hold back about his flirty desires; a man who knows how to make a woman feel like a queen.

I also find the following phrases exceptionally arousing to me:

    Will you allow me the pleasure of refilling your glass? 

    Do you need anything? I will take care of it. 

    Here is some extra gratuity for you.

    I want to buy you a gift from your wish list.

    I want to take you to Aruba (It’s all paid for !) 

    I would like to offer to pay your rent until you are 65. 

    I would like to leave my entire estate to you.

Q: There are so many fishes in the sea, why should I pick you?

A: You are the man I have been looking for (super wealthy but terminally ill and looking for a woman to spend all your money). You are stressed and want to relax. You enjoy exotic companionship. You like tall and strong women. You like to read what a woman has to offer from the inside. You love sensual touch and live in the Twin Cities metro. You are visiting the Twin Cities metro and want a passionate body rub. You value discretion, simplicity, healing, and affection. 

I acknowledge you're taking my honesty and straightforwardness very seriously by visiting me and that faith is something I’m incredibly grateful for.

Get to know my sessions.  

Q: Where is your In-call location? Do you visit residences? What is the parking like at your In-call site?

A: My studio is in Edina, a very safe and discreet neighborhood, just a short drive from MOA, MSP Airport, and Downtown Minneapolis. At my In-call location, there is ample free parking at any time.

I absolutely will not travel to residences, whether you are a repeat or a new client.

Q: What are your business hours? Are you available now? How much notice do you need?

A: Call me night owl McKenzie. I stay up late and get up late. Unless my website states otherwise, I am available daily from 1:30 p.m. to 11 p.m. I don’t accept morning appointments. If Noah's Ark departs in the morning, I will have to accept my fate and let it sail away.

As much as I want to please you, I’m not a bag of instant noodles that can be hot, spicy, and ready to serve in a minute. I have a life. I have to put my puppy & kitten through college; I have to spread awareness in America that General Tso’s chicken and Mongolian beef are not authentic Chinese dishes. I work with advance notice. I prefer 24 hours’ notice. Same-day appointments may be possible if a 3-hour notice is given.

Q: What kind of payment do you accept? 

A: Cash. Electronic payment is only for deposits, cancellation fees, and tips. If you receive food stamps, I may let you take me shopping at Costco.

Q: Is your rate negotiable? I promise I will be your regular, do you offer any discount? 

A: Yes. You can negotiate my rate up but not down—my dear.

Suppose you add my name as a beneficiary to your life insurance policy, I promise that I will be your wife in the next life. I will clean, cook for you, and massage your feet after work.

Q: Do you offer half-hour sessions? Do you offer extended sessions?

A: I don’t offer half-hour sessions, as half-hour sessions don’t let me perform my best work. You are free to stay half an hour and leave if you wish. My hourly rate will still be applied.

Please inquire with me about extended sessions.

Q: Do you use a massage table?

A: No. All sessions will be performed in my lovely bedroom.

Q: Can I use your shower? 

A: Absolutely. Nothing can be better than a shower to refresh your body and mind. The shower is available before/after our session. 

Q: Do you take outfit requests?

A: You are welcome to bring any outfit/stocking/high heel (Size 11) you like. I’d be happy to wear them for you.

Q: Are you party-friendly? Are you BDSM/Kinky friendly? Do you have a friend that can join us for a three-way session? 

A: Negative. I have zero tolerance for drugs and intoxication. I will refuse people who are under the influence. Safe play and play safe. 

Please respect my boundaries. I focus on body rub and companionship. Light fetishes, for example, a foot fetish will be okay, but BDSM is not my thing.

It is also worth mentioning that all of my sessions are one-to-one. I don’t participate in three ways.

Q: Do you entertain women, couples, trans, non-binary, gender-nonconforming, and other rare, endangered species?

A: I firmly believe in “live and let live.” I fully support people to be who they want to be, but I am only turned on by men, period. 

As James Brown used to sing, “It’s a man’s man’s man’s world, but it would be nothing without a woman or a girl.” (Yes, I think that woman is me) If you are the type of man who can follow instructions and know how to treat a woman, you are affectionately invited to discover what I have to offer.

Q: Can you describe your service? I want to know the details. What are we going to do in our session?

A: Well, my service is very heavenly. 

When you step into my studio, you and I will have to freeze and stay still in action like two mannequins. Whoever winks first will need to leave. If I win, you will have to donate your entire 401K to me. If you win, you will have the honor of paying my utility bills for the next 25 years. 🤪

Sir, you are paying for my time and my companionship. What may or may not happen is between two consenting adults. I love to kiss, but I don't tell. In my session, you will find where the therapeutic meets with the erotic. Talk is cheap. Let my actions speak louder than words!

Q: I have too much to lose. How do I know that my personal information is safe in your hands and that you will not blackmail me or contact my work/wife? 

A: Rest assured, Sir. I am a professional provider. Despite my silly jokes, I take your confidentiality very seriously. Your personal information is of no use to me. Everything you send will remain confidential and promptly deleted after the screening. I will not save any data. When you are out of my door, I don’t know you. After our session, I will not contact you.

I am all for keeping your private life private, but your dollars flow to me. Your personal life is none of my business. However, the thought of you handing me some cash makes me a little wet.

Q: I promise I am not Ted Bundy and have seen other providers. They can vouch for me. Do you accept references as a form of screening? 

A: Darling, Let me put it this way: Once upon a time, my pen pal’s best friend’s neighbor’s granny’s goldfish told me that he thinks I am the most wonderful human being on the earth. While I was flattered, I took the fish’s words with a grain of salt. So, If I don't have faith in a fish, why should I trust a recommendation from someone I have never met? I don’t personally know your reference, and I don’t know how they screened you either. How you behave with others has nothing to do with me. I don’t like to depend on other people for my safety. If you want to spend time with me, you must make ME believe you are a gentleman. Therefore, I do not accept references. 

In addition, I don’t give references. Please do not use me as a reference. I will not reply to any inquiries. I don’t want to get involved between you and a third person. Letting other people know that we have met is a violation of my privacy. What happens in my bedroom stays in my bedroom.

Q: Why do I have to pay a deposit, and how can I pay a deposit?

A: My time is as valuable as yours. In this industry, I need to know who is legitimate and who is not. A small deposit will separate the genuine gentlemen from the time wasters. A small deposit will prevent road accidents, heart attacks, strokes, pet sickness, family/work emergencies, and Covid. A small deposit will prevent our world from falling apart. 

A deposit can be paid by electric payment such as Cash App, Venmo, Zelle, Google Wallet, or Amazon/Uber/Lyft /Apple/Visa Gift Cards and Bitcoin.

If you don't have any electric payment set up already, it only takes a few minutes to sign up for any of these apps.

If you prefer not to leave a paper trail, you can go to a local store, purchase an Amazon/Uber/Lyft/Apple/Visa gift card by cash, and send me the redemption code.

Q: I am uncomfortable sending a small deposit because you may take my deposit and run away to Shangri-La, buy yourself designer dresses, private jets, vacation homes worldwide, and live happily ever after. What if I have to change or cancel my appointment?

A: Holy Moly! You have me all figured out. I was planning to ruin my established reputation and run off with your small deposit to live a life of luxury in Kansas City. I have already purchased my Greyhound ticket. The bus will depart 4 hours after you send me the deposit. I really like Kansas City (Shameful, I know).

Your deposit is not refundable but transferable. If you must cancel or reschedule and notify me 24 hours in advance, your deposit will be applied to our future appointment within the next six months. In the unlikely event I have to cancel, I will fully refund your deposit.

Q: I’m a P411 or The Erotic Review white list member, so can I skip your deposit requirement? I value my privacy and don't feel comfortable being screened, but I’m insanely handsome like the actor Chris Evans (or Ryan Reynolds). I can make you have an instant orgasm like a water fountain by gazing into your eyes, or I am willing to triple your rate and buy you a Louis Vuitton limited edition. Can I please see you without screening?

A: No way, no how.

Since I will welcome you into my personal space, I need to know that you are a well-mannered gentleman and that I am safe being close to you. I have no concern about who you are, how old you are, what you look like, what you do for a living, or who you voted for in the last election. My priority concern is my safety. 

It would make no difference to me if you were the former ambassador to China, the founder of the National Wild Turkey Federation, a weekly volunteer at the American Vegan Society, the nominee for Mr. Handsome in North America this year, or an American Express Black Card holder. If you don’t want to follow my instructions, then goodbye; good luck; keep warm and well-fed.

Q: I just want to have a good time. Why do you have to make it difficult for me?

A: I share your frustration. I truly do. I am really bothered when I walk into a Chinese restaurant for an authentic meal and only find orange chicken, sesame chicken, and cheese wontons on the menu. When that happens, I am terrified and agitated at the same time. You should see the horror on my face. I seriously want to press charges. 10 out of 10, I will leave.

Also, I am equally bothered by the fact that I didn’t marry an old, fat, bald billionaire Saudi royal family member, so I don’t have to ever fly in economy class again. 

Even more tragically, when I moved to the United States, I thought that I would find a boyfriend who would be hot and rich like Ben Affleck, who loves me more than life itself, who’d throw sacks of money on my face and then dive onto me in 69 position; who lets me rim him before I brush my teeth, then kisses me like there is no tomorrow, with whom I will have incredible sex 365 days a year. My heart shattered into a million pieces when that didn’t happen. My dear, the struggle is very real for both of us.

Of course. Here is the happy ending. 

Q: I was about to purchase a wife from Southeast Asia, but after reading your website, I think you are lovely. Would you marry me? 

A: Of course. Hon. Please inquire within. I have loved you for a thousand years and will love you for a thousand more. Don’t forget to bring money. A lot, a lot, a lot of money. 

And I got to pick the wedding song. “As long as you love me” by Backstreet Boys 

“As long as you pay me” by street corner girls.